OK, a bit of a disclaimer here – I'm not a fashion expert. I know what I like and over the years I have discovered what suits me and what doesn't; I know how I like to feel when I dress and I want what I wear to fit into my lifestyle but I don't avidly follow the runway fashions, although the Chanel A/W show is always worth a look. I like shopping for clothes and make-up and I have a Pinterest board full of looks that I like and to be honest, that probably goes for most women but having confidence in your own style is a bit of an art and a lot of trial and error.
One of the things that happens when people choose a Primal lifestyle is that along with weight-loss, feeling in better health and increased muscle definition comes a new-found body-confidence – suddenly they feel they actually want to show off a bit instead of hiding under their clothes, and of course, when we lose weight, what's more exciting than going out and getting some lovely new clothes that fit our newly discovered body?
Unfortunately, this is where a lot of older women struggle. If a woman has lived with a lack of body-confidence for many years, perhaps because of overweight, loss of confidence, belly fat that has appeared with the menopause, lost muscle definition or even post-pregnancy fat that somehow never got shifted, it can be very hard for her to know exactly how to update her style or even to know where to begin. Fashion magazines really don't help with their super-skinny, 20-something models and filtered photos, and very often, the latest runway fashions can seem too extreme for 'normal' women to wear. So in this blog I am going to look at some really basic tips on choosing a style that's right for you, but I'm also going to link into one of my favourite lifestyle vloggers, Dominique Sachse, who has some excellent tips and tricks in styling for us older women.
Really basic tips for finding your style
Who remembers Trinny and Susannah? You know, those bossy, uncompromising, bosom-obsessed women who somehow managed to make even the most unlikely victims look amazing? Well, love them or hate them (I loved them!), they did actually have some pretty good basic tips for dressing well.
Know your shape
One of the most important, if not the most important thing is to know your body shape. If you know your shape and know how to dress it, you will always look good. Stand in front of a full-length mirror in just your underwear (I know, I know, but you won't regret this); what shape are you really? Do you have a long body and shorter legs or vice versa? How do your shoulders compare to your hips – wider, narrower, about the same? Do you have a waist – is it well-defined, just slightly curved, or perhaps non-existent? Do you carry your weight in your legs, your hips or your belly? Are you top-heavy or is your weight lower down? Do you have long or short limbs? Which bits are you most proud of? Try to get an overall picture of your shape because once you know that, you can know the best way to dress it. For example, I also loved Gok Wan (How to Look Good Naked), but he always put women in cinched-in waist styles. Now I absolutely love that style, especially the fifties look with the tiny waists and full skirts, but I have a short body and longer legs so wearing something like a belt that cuts my already short body in half just makes me look hopelessly out of proportion. To make the best of my body shape, I wear slightly longer tops that disguise where my body ends and my legs begin. My shoulders are also wider than my hips (remember the teacher who said I'd make a good rugby player...) so again, I try to find things that balance out top and bottom – I seriously dislike skinny jeans because I just end up looking like Max Wall (goodness, my age is really showing now!).
Find styles that balance you out and emphasise your best bits – if you've got great legs, make sure you show them off; if your bust is your best asset, wear things that make it look great, if you've got a fabulous butt, shake it out – emphasising your best bits will take attention away from the bits you don't like as much.
Know your colours
As well as your body-shape, it's good to know which colours suit you best. Very simply, if you have warm-toned skin, warm colours will suit you best and if you have cool-toned skin, cool colours will suit you best. There are lots of tools and tips on the internet for finding whether you're warm or cool-toned but I think one of the best ways is just to put something on that always makes you feel great and really look at yourself in it. Why do you look and feel so good in it? Is it something you go back to time and again because you feel great? Do people comment when you wear it? Does it make your skin look smoother and younger? Study it closely because it's likely that the colours and shape are right for you. I am warm-toned so I stick to warm colours – warm pinks like coral or peach, warm blues like cornflower and light navy, browns, creams and warm beige. I look like death warmed up in black so I never buy it and it infuriates me when I hear 'everyone looks good in black' – No they don't! In fact, very few women look really great in black – darker colours that suit your skin tone will look much more flattering. White can also be a challenge if you're warm-toned and ivory or cream might look better. Conversely, if you're cool-toned, you can probably wear jewel colours, pure white, soft greys and some black, but you might look washed out in yellows, creams and browns. The great thing is, once you know your colours, shopping for clothes is quicker – I can just skip by whole racks of clothes when I can see they're not my colours, although I sometimes have to wait for 'my' colours to be in fashion.
What's your style?
I have a confession – I have several pairs of beautiful high-heeled shoes in my wardrobe that never see the light of day. Why? Because I absolutely love high heels and I absolutely never wear them. I love the shape of high-heeled shoes and I love the way they look when they're on – they're elegant, sexy, pretty and classy but they simply don't fit into my lifestyle. And I think this is why it's so important to find your own style which fits into your way of living. I was a tomboy when I was younger and I guess I still am so my style tends to be towards jeans, trousers and shorts, but I still like to look feminine so I go for pretty tops and feminine styles so the whole look isn't too boyish. You might prefer a more classic look with tailored styles and elegant accessories, or a romantic look with layers, pleats and arty jewellery. Whatever it is, you need to be comfortable and happy in it knowing you look fab.
Makeup
Makeup is very personal and whether you wear it or not is very much a personal choice – I object very much to an assumption that women should wear makeup in the same way I object to the idea that women should wear high heels. Obviously makeup has its uses – it can even out skin tone, hide blemishes and emphasise our best bits, and it can make us feel glamorous. I definitely don't wear makeup everyday but I do wear it if I'm going out, if only eye-brow pencil, because eyebrows are less defined as we get older, a little eye-liner and mascara. I feel better dressed when I have makeup on and it can really complete an outfit, but if I'm messing around on my paddle-board or pottering round the house with my cats, I don't bother. My mum is a marvel – she's in her eighties and she puts her makeup on every day without fail; in fact, if she doesn't put her makeup on, we know she's unwell. I just love that she does that – she's always well-dressed and she always has her makeup on – I don't think I have ever seen her scruffy or unkempt.
The problem with makeup here in Spain is keeping it on in the heat. Now we're in July, the temperatures are up in the 30's daily and will nudge towards 40 as we go into August. Eyeliner can be down my face five minutes after I put it on and mascara has to withstand both sweat and seawater. So I'm linking here to an excellent video by Dominique Sachse on heat-proofing your make up for the summer. Dominique is a news anchor in Texas and she does a weekly vlog on all kinds of lifestyle topics, but because she's in her 50's her tips are relevant to women like us unlike so many fashion vloggers.
So enjoy these videos and let me know how you found your own style. I love to read your comments. But remember -
For heat-proofing your makeup
For some summer styles
What a great blog, totally related to this. Haven’t really put a lot of thought to my body shape, just throw some clothes on and voila! But many a time over the years what I once looked good in, no longer suits as my body shape has changed. Since turning Primal, I have now lost a stone and don’t feel as frumpy and enjoy wearing shorts all day every day as we now live in Spain, whereas before I’d shy away from any leg exposure! 🙈 And tbh I loved black but now like the warmer colours, I’m certainly going to put some more thought into my total body shape and not just the bad bits!!!